“The law of giving is very simple: if you want joy, give joy. If love is what you seek, offer love.” – Deepak Chopra
While the holidays are the most joyous of times filled with loved ones, presents, glittering trees, and delicious smells from a cozy kitchen, they can be some of the most difficult times as well for the broken-hearted. We miss our loved ones who have passed on and ex’s who have moved on. Well, maybe not the ex’s on second thought? We reflect on regrets and relive past moments with misty-eyed nostalgia forgetting that the best of times are yet to come.
I think feeling sad is only human. In fact, I think it means we are alive. Just know it’s okay to feel down to a point but then it’s imperative to step out of the shadow and let the light shine in. But how do we do that without self-medicating with food, prescription medication, over spending, and other poor choices?
Here’s a different prescription, give 21 gifts.
Studies show it takes 21 days to form a habit or break a habit, so focus on love rather than sorrow for 21 consecutive days. Not just love, but BIG love. I understand when we are in a dark place the last thing on our mind is love. But that’s exactly why you must. Simply put, when you focus on giving a gift of love every day rather than dwelling in sorrow, by then end of 21 days you will be in a brighter place. I can testify personally and I’ve witnessed the transformation in so many others. I’d even go so far to tell you the positive shift in your spirit will occur even sooner than expected.
So what are the rules you ask?
1. Who – There are no limits as to who will be the recipient of your gifts; friends, family, neighbors, strangers, children, elderly, and even yourSELF. Just try to pick 21 different people so you can spread the love.
2. What – The gifts can monetarily cost next to nothing. They can be a compliment, spending time with someone, a hand written card or even forgiveness. Bake a cake, donate clothes or give a bouquet of flowers.
Here’s an example from my own gift giving. I had an old refrigerator sitting in my garage unused for many years. It wasn’t in the best shape but still worked well and had a freezer to boot. I placed an ad on Craig’s List seeking a big family in need of a second refrigerator. A dad showed up beaming as he described his large, young family and how it would be perfect for juice drinks and freezer pops. Better yet, his wife had been asking for a spare refrigerator for quite a while. As we all know, “if momma ain’t happy, no one’s happy”. Watching the refrigerator pull out on the back of a trailer, I was just as happy as that dad thinking about those kids giggling and running to the garage on a hot summer day.
I can assure you the love you receive back will be ten-fold and improve your spirit. Despair will surely dissolve or at the very least, be severely weakened. We rise by lifting others. So rise up girlfriend.
21 days, 21 gifts. Give it a try. What do you have to lose, except sadness?